Tuesday, November 15, 2011

The Box of Chocolates

I was talking to a good friend of mine yesterday and today.

It started out as a normal "oh hi, how are you?" kind of conversation, but it escalated. We ended up talking a small bit about life, and, since I wasn't really very cheerful at the time, I said that the worst part about life just might be living.

I know that isn't true, but I was being an idiot. Don't judge.

Anyway, this friend responded with a passionate "you're wrong" by giving me some quote on the difference between living and surviving. I said I basically agreed, but in the end life is just... cold, bitter, horrible, unfair, and, at times, unbearable.

I was talking to another friend about this last week. He was telling me how he finds himself depressed too often. There's never anything to do but sleep, he said. Another thing he said was that every time he would be with friends and have a good time, he'd return home, and the depression would set in with extra impact, as if to balance out the good time he had.

I can relate. It's crazy, and it's a tough thing to deal with. I'm not going to conclude this post, by the way. This topic isn't something I can end, only you can do that for yourself. My only reason for posting this is to get your lazy brain to work. Ask yourself something: Are you happy?

My guess is that you're too busy to think about that, and even right now, some of you aren't really answering that question. Even though you've slowed down enough to hop on Blogspot and read this retarded blog by that Clark kid, you still have things to do. Your mind isn't paying attention, but maybe you're grasping what I mean now. So ask yourself again, maybe even out loud, "Am I happy?"

Crazy question, I know. I'm not trying to get you to be all depressed now, but I want you to think a little about this. Life is short, but it's beyond powerful. Do something with it, even if that something is merely improving your view on life, because that will affect the people around you, and affect your impact on people around you.

Think.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

You Can Thank Me Now

Hey there!

Funny how I post so late at night. That fact makes this blog simply horrible. After all, nighttime effects your thinking. It's true! I've proven it. Many times. At night.

Awful stuff.

Anyway, how are you? You can't really answer that, because I won't hear/see you... but I figured you'd think me nice and considerate if I asked how you're feeling.

Topic of the day: Women.

I KNOW, I KNOW. This just got awkward. I think all of you know me, and you're all thinking: "Oh wow, he is going to make a complete fool of himself. He doesn't know women at all." etc. While I appreciate these pleasant and Christian thoughts, I think you're jumping to conclusions, but only a little. See, I don't deny that this is probably going to be a poorly written/ thought out post, but.... well, whatever. I'm done defending myself. Just read the stupid post, or exit. I'm just going to start a new paragraph now.

Jeez.

You know what? You made me not want to write this post anymore. Even though you haven't read it yet.

Way to go, guys. Be ashamed of yourselves! I'm off to go sulk. Alone.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

And I Threw It On The Ground!

Just some boring updates in this post.

First off, scroll way down and find my post The Evidence of Love. It's a short story I wrote a couple years ago. It's probably my favorite story I've ever written, and maybe my best. In other words, I love it. As a result, I decided last night that I'm going to write another part to that story. It had a good ending, but it's... unfinished. I'm going to put a sequel together. Like The Evidence of Love, it'll be pretty short; it's not going to be some massive book. My guess is that it'll be about a page or two long. Short and sweet's the way to go, right?

I'll try to have that finished and posted by Thanksgiving. Be on the lookout.

Another thing, The Secret Life of an American Homeschooler, the blog, should be up this week. Be watching that. The link/URL is active right now, but we haven't put anything up yet. We should be able to upload the old posts, but we're not sure yet. Again, stay posted. The moment that blog is operational, I'll inform you guys here.

Lastly, I'm an adult! Well, in a legal sense, I am. 18 as of Friday, baby. I finished my Eagle Scout requirements the night before, and I got my Class C license on my birthday. Nothing can stop me now.

Well, not completely true. I'll say that if I get into USCGA. Then nothing will be able to stop me! mwahaha.

And now you see, truly, how mature I am.


Peace out, hotdogs. Keep checking the blog for more horrible posts.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

The Way The Roses Smelled

A wise man once told me "life friends are the friends that stick with you through thick and thin. They're the ones you want with you when bad things happen, and you can always count on them, no matter what." That was my pastor, Pastor Bob Martz.

He's right you know, and I'm not just saying that because he's a godly teacher; I really agree with him. You all know I've had my fair share of hardcore life troubles, namely, the death of my best friend in '09. In that time, all the people who I had been pretty good friends with in choir became my really good friends. Some of them I considered like my family, and a few of them, I considered... priceless. Literally magnificent. The bond between us was tighter than anything you can imagine. It was amazing.

I'm not bragging about the great relationship I have with my friends, and I'm also not playing victim just cause my friend died a couple years ago. Bear with me, I do have an excellent point here.

Time has a habit of continuing, and in my story, that's no exception. As the sun kept rising and falling, our bond began to strain a little.
The first example of that I can think of is when I heard my mother and my best friends mom talk about how our get togethers could be called Hugfest 2009. I was beyond offended at the time, but now I see their point. We kind of got a little carried away with the hugs, but hey, it was a rough time.
As time continued, some of our parents began placing some limitations on our interaction, and thats where it hit the fan. The bond that me and my friends had made had been officially threatened and challenged by our parents, and we resisted. in vain. Again, I'm not being critical of my or my friends' parents. I'm just talking. I'll explain shortly. After we started seeing each other less frequently, and doing the whole Hugfest thing less frequently, we started to drift a lot. Our family bond returned to friendship and we resumed to take each other for granted. Of course, there's a lot of drama and emotional stuff that went into that, but long story short, nothing changed.
2.5 years later, what changed? Excellent question. I started asking myself that a little bit in the spring, and the question grew a lot. I began asking myself how I lost control over the relationships I had with a few certain people. I hopped on facebook and over the days and weeks, waited to see a particular two people on chat. Eventually did, and apologized to them, and asking how hard it would be to restore the relationship we had before. Both said we should give it a go. One meant it, one didn't. The one that did, we didnt get a long for very long. So now you ask yourself the same question, how did Cameron's friendships change at all over these last two years? Answer: sadly, they haven't much. Of all the close friends I had the summer of '09, there's one I'm completely comfortable talking with about anything. We don't talk much, but when we do, it's like we never skipped a beat. But for all the others, I still love them all to death. I'd still be willing to talk to them on the phone as they tell me their problems. I only wish that was still mutual. And here's the other thing, guys. Actions do truly speak louder that words. I can say all the right things here, but that doesn't mean anything. There's one close friend that I let down. It was awful, and I didn't really realize it til about 8 months later. I can say how much I care about that person, and I do, SO much, but that doesnt even start to repair the bridge of trust I burned.

Do you see where Im getting at? Life friends are the hardest to keep. They require a lot of time and attention, and it doesn't seem worth it, but trust me, when you're feeling lonely and there's no one to talk to about your life, those friends you blew off suddenly become reeeeeeaaaal important. Trust me.

I hope this post isn't making anyone sad. I just realize how depressing Im being, especially if you part of the whole Wyatt thing. That's not my goal at all, but this is a sobering topic. Here's my tip to you. If you have an important friend in your life, keep him/her there, even when you fight, which you will if you're close. Even when they're annoying. Always. Someday, you'll regret your decision to replace the position of "best friend" with someone who seemed more tolerable. You can't replace a faithful and loving friend. They're too precious to be traded out.

Last question: is Cameron friendless? Answer: nope. I have friends. Quite a few. Life friends? Eh, maybe 4 at the moment. Idk. I expect to gain and lose friends all throughout my life. As for just keeping in touch, that's what facebook is for. For keeping my life friends close, that's what the speed dial presets on my phone are for.

"A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity." (Proverbs 17:17 KJV)

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

You Will Never Break The Chain.

I have news. Exciting news. I, personally, am excited.

Let's continue that thought later. First, I want to address my negligence with this blog. Contrary to the way things appear to be, I have not forgotten to post on this blog. In fact, I think of things to post nearly every day. I simply don't have the time. Not until I'm eighteen and finished with this Eagle Scout stuff. (Speaking of which, feel free to donate money to my noble cause!) But seriously, I haven't forgotten you faithful followers, you're simply not my top priority at the moment. Sorry, but life is unfair. Become used to that fact.

Now. FOR THE NEWS. Herman Cain is in the lead!

No, that's not the news. It's true, and I'm beyond excited and happy, but that's not the news. Here we are.

Blogger Veterans: Well, not really. Just anyone who's been on here for a year:
Do you remember The Secret Life of an American Homeschooler? Prepare your minds to be blown. We're back, baby.
Well, not for certain, but probably. I'm talking to the authors and seeing how interested they are. However, the odds of that link being resurrected from the dead are very good.
Former SLAH followers: the old posts have been archived by us, so we'll probably publish them and continue like the blog was never shut down.
New SLAH followers: The Secret Life of an American Homeschooler is essentially the blog version of the notorious "Stereotypical Homeschooler" video on YouTube. In other words, we mock ourselves, and other homeschool students, by fitting perfectly into the stereotype, and posting from that point of view.

Want a sneak peak? Too bad. Keep checking here and I'll post as to whether or not the blog is returning. Despite the outcome of this possibility, I already feel like John Belushi in Blues Brothers. We're getting the band back together. Well, the authors. But, hey, who cares anyway...

You guys totally need to check it out. We used to have about well over fifty readers, and we only had the blog originally for what, a couple months? I can't remember, but it wasn't long. Anyway, the blog was a success for a reason. It was amazing. Sorry for bragging, but I have the right to be arrogant. My internet job is to write about how I'm better than you. or, it was. and may be again.

--End rant.--

--New rant--

This is the part of the post were you get bored, just so you know. It's probably a good idea to just exit now.

Recently, I've had a major issue in my life. I don't mean an issue as in a moral sin or anything, it wasn't an action by anyone, it was just a really really powerful thought in my mind. It was driving me insane, because I wanted to act on it, but didn't think it was worth it, but unfortunately, I couldn't make this idea leave my head. It was like a woodpecker who won't leave until that hole is massive. Long story short, I acted on it, and it was flung back in my face embarrassingly. Moral of the story, don't be stupid, people. When people say 'follow your dreams', that's great and all, but I feel like it's a little bit retarded, unless you're insecure and self conscious. If not, please don't follow your dreams, plan them, and then set plan B. Chances are, you're not going to be found on your YouTube page by Justin Timberlake and Usher and suddenly become the number one artist in the world, so don't plan on it. Sure, never say never is an awesome thought, but just because you hope for your dream to come true, doesn't mean it will. You might die really upset that you never get live out a particular dream, but don't dwell on that. Go do things you know you can do. Be happy you have a job. That's the first step towards a dream, because dreams cost a lot of money.

Do I make sense anymore? No, I know. Sorry about that. My point is only this: Don't allow yourself to be disappointed when your optimistic dreams are shown to be rooted in nothing more than a hope you've manufactured in your late night thinking time. Invest into your thought before you let it become a hope, and analyze it before you let yourself elevate it to a dream. Disappointment is... disappointing.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

I feel like my heart is breaking. Some things in life are too precious. Yet, theyre usually taken for granted. Its beyond awful. Short post.

Monday, August 29, 2011

Yes, I Regret That..

I get sucked into idiocy all the time.

And I'm just going to warn you, it's 10:10pm right now and I've been thinking about my life, which oftentimes puts me in a depressed mood.. So I'm going to be writing by the flow of emotion in this post, and I'll probably be sounding like a girl, but hey, I won't be offended if you stop reading here. (actually I will, but why should that stop you?)

For example. Without being specific at all, I've made bad decisions in the past, like everyone else, you know? Well, over that time, I've gotten new great friends, lost touch with old friends, started friendships that weren't very well founded, which I eventually ended, and so on. In the midst of this chaos, I feel like I've learned to appreciate things in life. Like the famous line,
"You never know what you got until it's gone."

Isn't it awful, losing something, or losing someone? Especially if you feel like you could've done something about it. I'm not talking about someone who's lost their life, though I do feel like that's applicable too, I'm talking about someone who is still very much alive, as are you, but your lives, which once intertwined, now continue in different directions. It's a sad part of life. Right now, I feel like people get so caught up in when the next Twilight movie comes out or the next Justin Bieber album or even what they're going to wear tomorrow for school, that they don't realize what's one of the most important things in life: the people around you.

I don't know about you, but I feel like at the beginning of 2010, I had the best friends I could possibly ask for. We were so completely solid, and we'd do anything for each other, and it wasn't just one or two friends like that, it was like 15. (Don't get me wrong, the friends I have now I care about just as much.) Unfortunately, In the summer of 2010, we all drifted apart, and come autumn 2010, we were barely talking. That's what I mean when I say that it's painful to see friends drift from "Oh yeah he/she's my best friend!" to "Oh him/her? Yeah, I know who you're talking about.."

I know this blog is like the cheesiest thing on the planet, and I probably seem like I'm just issuing out my challenges for the week in how to better yourself and your community, but I'm sorry, it's jut the things on my mind. I personally have such major regrets in letting certain people out of my life, and I wish that it hadn't happened. I just want you guys to be aware of how incredibly easy it is to drift from your best friend, especially if it's over something retarded, like summer plans or a girl or anything like that.
Life is short, and God is most important aspect of your life, but the people by you are the second, far beyond the third.

Monday, August 22, 2011

10 days behind.

My apologies, my wonderful 8 followers.

I got caught up in the whole "back to school" thing as well as attempting to make progress in my Eagle Project, so I have broken my promise to blog twice a week, post a picture, once a month, and probably the video thing too. But hey, there's always new hope for September, right? 

You're bored now, so we'll change the subject. I want to post a little something that I've been thinking about, and that's both the delicate importance of life, as well as the establishment of government, society, and those sorts of things. The main factor that really got me thinking about these things actually happens to be an amazing tv show called Jericho. The show is about a sudden nuclear attack that effectively wipes out the entire US. government in a matter of minutes. As the show progresses, panic spreads through the small town of Jericho, Kansas, when people realize they're on their own. It makes you think as multiple scenarios appear challenging the town's sense of ethics and moral character, and new governments emerge claiming to be the US Federal government, but slowly turn the area into a dictatorship run by the strongest groups of people in the area. It's a show about survival. One line in the show really captures the show "This will not only be a battle for our survival, but for our humanity." When the town nearly runs out of food, should the town administration ration food to certain people, or equally distribute the remaining food to everyone, causing the whole town to starve? Watching the show, any scenario like that seems so distant from our life, where all we have to worry about is getting our homework done before Monday morning, or trying to remember to set the alarm clock for 7am for the following workday. The fact is, everyday, everyone has the opportunity to make a small impact on somebody else's life. Unfortunately, most people, myself included, don't realize that, and treat others well based on how they feel at the time, not on what is Biblically and morally correct. 

I just realized that I'm probably not making very much sense. Let me try this again.

I've realized that I pay too much attention to myself. When I die, I don't want to have invested in my own life as much as I have invested in God's kingdom, and his people. Earlier today while I was reading my history book, I read a section that I posted as my Facebook status: "Fundamentally, we are not American, Canadian, or Chinese, we are humans; children of Adam, creatures of God." I love that line so much. I feel like whenever I do think outside of myself, I still think inside a box, either my dear friends, my church friends, or if I think really large: America. But the world? All of creation? It's a much larger picture, almost too large, however, I feel like it's one that God's called his people to impact.  In Genesis, God tells Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply, and take dominion over the Earth. Be fruitful. Fast-forward in the Bible a few dozen books, and you'll find the Great Commission, which is almost like Episode Two of the Genesis command. "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” 

How dare we ignore that command. I remember a dude named Jonah who tried to ignore a command from God.. and he got eaten alive. I don't know about you, but I don't want to go on a cruise in the Caribbean someday and get eaten by some freaky huge fish. If you've ever cracked open Psalms, you've probably read something about how important it is for people to listen to those in authority, whether that's a parent, government, or God himself. Let's try to do that, shall we? 

I know I've wandered majorly from my opening statement about how we should value others and know I'm presenting a lecture on the importance of obedience. In fact, this just might be the most unorganized blog post of all time. However, I'm just trying to make the point that I'm personally sickened at how selfish I can be. It's something I'm working on, and I think you should too. Regardless of what he did to little kids, Michael Jackson kind of got the picture. Just listen to Man in the Mirror

"If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself, then make a change."

Friday, August 12, 2011

GOP Presidential Mess? Yes. But hope to come.

-Deep Breath-

Well...

I don't know who else felt like they were watching a bunch of immature children fighting tonight, but I thought candidates for the President of the United States were supposed to be concerned with the issues at hand, not worry about little things that don't matter. An American President has to be made of passion, not the fake mask of it so he can have a two-term presidency. Don't get my wrong people, I'm not so naive to think that all Presidents are made of such qualities or that even 25% of them are; what I mean is that those are things Presidents ought to be made of, and it shames our country, our political system, and our frustrated voters when the majority of the candidates lack the courage to stand up for what they believe.

The debate first went south when Bachmann and Pawlenty started their verbal brawling. Rather than improve their image significantly over the other and disregard their opponent's comments, rise above it, and address the REAL issues at hand, they took the time to go back and forth with their endless insults, until Pawlenty ran out of things to say. I boggles my mind that such supposedly well educated individuals with the leadership excellence they had shown in the past could stoop down to the level of my five and six year old brothers, lashing out at one another until their enemy couldn't return a punch. Very, very juvenile, and I lost a lot of respect for them both, and, according to the polls, so did a large part of the country.

The insanity continued and Mitt Romney tap danced his way through the fiery questions aimed for him. Time and time again, Romney would be asked a fundamental and trivial question and he would repetitively give the same responses Obama did in 2007 and 2008; very vague and insignificant answers. When asked 2-3 times on his stance on gay marriage laws, Romney finally answered that he did not support same-sex marriage, but he didn't believe that it should be illegal. Is it just me, or did that not make sense?

I don't know what's wrong with the men, but Huntsman and Ron Paul were completely high.
First with Huntsman.
Was I the only one who thought he didn't make any sense, but also didn't answer any questions? I think that for about 80% of his responses, he replied with "I'm very proud with myself and the work I've shown as Governor in the past. I've shown leadership, and that's what we need in the White House!"
Sorry bro. I'm not buying that. At first it seemed like he was dancing around like Romney to preserve his image. After all, Romney was the leading candidate. He had nothing to lose by avoiding the questions. Then I realized that I didn't even know who Huntsman was! How could a stranger protect his image? He can't. All that that man did was shoot himself in the foot, especially after calling the China-US communication ineffective, after being recognized as an ambassador to China. What an idiot. I weep for the broken mind of anyone who could vote for Huntsman. He's simply a fail.

Now, let's analyze Ron Paul.
I'm not going to lie, I really liked him for a while there! Then we got into the discussion on Iran obtaining nuclear weapons. Somehow, the old Texan thought that wasn't an issue at all, comparing the threat to the Soviet Union, China, and Cuba, you know, the US dealt with them and we're fine. Iran will be the same way.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME? How old is this guy? Old enough to be senile? Think, sir, it's a little more than that. Do realize that the Cold War was a major epidemic in our country and rippled panic throughout the nation for years. Even if Iran doesn't fire, like the Soviet Union, the stress levels will drive America to insanity, not to mention Israel. The President of Iran has repeatedly stated that he wants to destroy Israel, and he doesn't care about who tries to stop him, whether it be the United States, Great Britain, or anyone else. So now where does that put us, Congressman Paul? If Iran decides to nuke Israel, I'm sure we'll get involved. According to Iran, they have no problem blasting through our chest if it means they'll hit Israel in the end. We're not only looking at losing a dear ally, but also going to war, and not like we're at right now. This would be an awful war filled with nuclear weapons and horrors that may lead to our own shores. I don't mean to sound paranoid or anything, cause it's not at all far fetched.
Stop being so naive, Ron Paul. Men that are aware of world news run for President.

So who do we have left? I've already criticized Bachmann, Pawlenty, Romney, Huntsman, and Paul, so that leaves me Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich, and Herman Cain.

Rick Santorum, all in all, did a pretty decent job. He wasn't afraid to answer the questions and he had a lot of passion, too much, I think. When the panel failed to take the time to direct questions toward him, Santorum began to become frustrated, and I think at one point he actually requested a question. Later, when he and Ron Paul were debating foreign policy, he was cut short and, in frustration, continually spoke while Ron Paul was giving his views and opinions. I think Santorum is a great guy and he has good ideas, and I think he was much more logical than Ron Paul, and I wouldn't mind him being in the White House, but I think he needs to learn to control his passion before it turns into anger and he loses his sense of etiquette on national television. Good man, good candidate, but he wasn't too hot tonight.

Newt, on the other hand, was on fire. Every question, even the extremely hard ones, he nailed. Every time he opened his mouth, he continued to sweep people off their feet. I think he'd be a fantastic President; he's smart, he's focused, and he's determined. Unfortunately, he's also behind in the race. His campaign is largely in debt and he doesn't have his foot in the door as well as the other candidates, but if he can pull the rest of the debates in his favor like he has tonight, he may indeed have a chance.

Today I've saved the best for last, at least in my opinion. If you have a Facebook or Twitter and you've looked at my profile recently, you know I love Herman Cain. After tonight, I only like him more. He didn't receive a lot of questions, for whatever reason, but the ones he did answer were very well said. He spoke with conviction and passion, and he stood with the confidence of a man who knew how to use leadership to turn around an economy. Cain did a fantastic job, and he's still my definite favorite. I'm also happy to say that according to Fox News' polls, the general public said he did best out of all the candidates tonight with a percentage well into the 80s. Despite the discouragement from some candidates, I see a hope on board the Cain Train. I'll continue to campaign for him until the election next year.

All in all, the debate was decent. At worst, it was informing. At best, it was refreshing and hopeful to see Newt Gingrich and Herman Cain stand strong before America. We need a leader, and I believe that our hope lies in one of these two men. In any case, I encourage anyone and everyone who reads this to stay informed on the issues and actively campaign for a new President. Our nation is falling apart while candidates of the same party attack each other on national television. We need a solution now.

For me, that's Herman Cain

2 Chronicles 7:14: "If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land."

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Guess Who's Back?

Me.

I know. I'm gone for a year, expected never to return, not to mention that I've never been a very diligent blogger.  I'm sure that of my current eight followers, only two of you are even going to pay attention to me, but that's fine. I'm back to have fun.

So here's what I'm thinking.

I'm going to be posting about once a week. It may be more than that, and it may be less. I refuse to limit this blog to one themed topic, because my mind can't handle those kind of constraints. You may be seeing a critical analysis of our corrupt Judicial system one day and the very next a short video on why I love chocolate chip cookies. Expect anything.

I've never tried doing this part, but I'm going to try to put my YouTube channel to work. I'll be uploading a video once a month. Please, don't expect much. I've never been in any kind of video-making class or tutorial in my life. I promise the first few videos will be horrible, but hopefully they'll improve over the months!

I'm going to try my hand at photography again. I know that's like a big trend with all the blog/facebook people, or anyone who actually uses the internet. I'll probably be posting a "photo of the week" from the shots I take any given week. Don't hold me to that too solidly though, I will miss many weeks. I promise. Everything I plan on doing here is just for fun, not for any recognition from anyone. I'm writing this to you, but I may not have anyone read this post for a long time! That's okay, because if I post on here again anytime soon, I'll feed accomplished.

In my year long break from Blogger, they've provided new features on this little site. Apparently I can fire off a short text or picture and it'll post it on here! I'll definitely be putting that to work with funny pictures I see and quotes my friends say. Again, expect anything.

Every now and then, I'm going to post a rant on my future. If you want, just skip over it. I'll probably change my mind on half the things I say, but it's fun to dream and share dreams.

Anyway, That's my current plan. Who knows how this blog will look in 2-3 months, but hey, it's worth a shot, right?

Like the new layout? You better. I spent over an hour designing it.

I'm looking forward to this.

PS. I'll use my twitter to post on my blog, so feel free to follow me there @DewesFail.

Numbers 6:24-26: "May the Lord bless you and keep you. May the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you. May the Lord lift his countenance upon you and give you peace."